Adventure Time: Socrates' WIsh

You all probably know about the hit show "Adventure Time" on Cartoon Network. And you all probably saw the premiere...or you think you did.

I was awake in my living room, it was about 3:30 AM, and I was watching TBS. I was surfing through the TV guide when I came across a new episode of Adventure Time called "Socrates' Wish". I changed the channel to Cartoon Network, and the intro of the show was just finishing. I laid back in my seat, waiting for the newest episode to play.

What I saw was exceedingly unpleasant. It started out in the Candy Kingdom, with Finn and Jake racing up to the doors. They burst through them, and I saw that the Peppermint Butler's head had been bitten off by some sort of dragon. Blood squirted out from PB's neck, and the dragon saw Finn and Jake. The dragon in question then flew off.

The pair walked through the castle, seeing all sorts of Candy Kingdom citizens either dead or just sitting up, smiling ominously. They walked past Cinnamon Bun, a sit-upper, when suddenly he grabbed onto Jake. Finn tried to throw him off, but he was unsuccessful. Jake suddenly turned brown, and squelching noises could be heard as he fell out of view, as well as the screams of the dog. Finn, cautious, continued on.

He made it to the main part of the palace. Princess Bubblegum could be seen seen sitting in her throne.

"Oh, Finn, thank you for coming! All of my citizens have turned into zombies!"

I could barely make this out due to the fact that the audio was a little distorted.

"Any time, Princess. I lost Jake on the way here...any way you could help him?" Audio distorted again.

"Finn, we can't help the people in Japan, can we?" Finn stepped closer.

"Japan? What's--" Suddenly, the throne jolted around to display a green Princess Bubblegum with half of her body missing. All that was left was bones. She leaped at Finn, biting his head off gruesomely. Blood spatters out as Finn falls down, dead.

"Down With The Sickness" started to play as some candy zombies carried Jake and Finn's lifeless bodies outside. They threw them off of cliffs, then celebrated. Suddenly, they turned back to normal. Also as sudden, the ground turns into a pack of leeches. In fact, everything turned into leeches. The candy citizens were sucked into the pits of leeches, slowly dying. The scene faded to black, then white text came into view:

"THE ENCLOSED EPISODE OF ADVENTURE TIME HAS BEEN REMOVED FOR INAPPROPRIATE CONTENT BY THE US GOVERNMENT. PLEASE CONTINUE WATCHING YOUR REGULAR PROGRAMS ON CARTOON NETWORK."

It was a traumatic experience, for sure. I slowly went back to sleep, only to be woken up by my mother: it was time for the first day back at elementary school.